S2/03. Convergence

3.2 Mae West

Summer 1998, Mae's & Nia's apartment, San Myshuno

"West and Blossom residence, it's Mae here!" Mae chirped into the phone and stuffed her finger into her ear against the party noise behind her.

Silence on the other side.

Mae waited.

"Hello?" She then asked again.

Still no answer. Maybe the line was disturbed, or they got the wrong number. Just when Mae was about to hang up, someone inhaled sharply.

"Hi..." it came hesitantly, and slightly squeaky.

It'd been a while, but Mae recognized the voice immediately.

"Mari!"

The last person Mae thought would call her!

Mariella'd taken Mae's leave maybe even worse than Herbert. 

Ever since, she refused to talk to Mae, or even as much as look at her. She even left the room whenever Mae'd been back at the Schnautz' house to settle the divorce.

Surely something bad must've happened, that she'd decided to call Mae, of all people! In what kind of trouble did Mariella get herself? One terrible scenario after another raced through Mae's mind; from new fights with classmates to failing classes again until even dropping out of school; from various accidents to sudden illnesses; Mae feared the worst.

"How are you? Is everything okay?"

From Mariella's side, again, came no answer except a few mumbles.

Mae's trepidation raised. "What happened? Should I come to you? I'm always there for you; I promised that, remember?!" She almost tripped over the words in her anxiety.

Finally, Mariella found her voice, and it was not a kind one.

"Yeah, just as if you didn't drop me like a hot potato and move miles away," she snorted.

Mae almost chocked over the verbal punch.

Mariella wasn't quite wrong, but the way she said it, hurt.

"I mean it," Mae insisted and forced herself to keep her composure. "I'll be right there if you need me to come."

She'd promised Mariella the night she'd left, and she'd meant it; then and now. Mariella had always been a light in Mae's life, even when the rest of it slowly became so dull and cage-y. They were both so alike, kindred spirits, and Mae found so much of her younger self in the girl. She couldn't imagine loving her more if Mariella were her biological daughter, and losing her hurt no less than her broken marriage.

But during her head over heels escape, Mae had been so caught up fuming over the messed-up men in her love life that she hadn’t really thought about how her departure would impact both her and Mariella's lives. Only when the girl stood right in front of her and her packed suitcase, it hit her that by leaving Herbert, she'd have to leave the girl behind, too.

As it hit Mariella, who unleashed all her anger and disappointment over it, and then never talked to Mae again.

Until now.

Mae was determined to use this opportunity and make up for hurting Mariella, in any way possible. If Mariella needed her, she'd be there in a minute. Or better said, in the time it took to catch the next train to Oasis Springs.

"Mari? What do you need? What happened?"

"N-Nothing..." Mariella finally mumbled. Her tone changed, it lost its sharpness and briefly it was almost vulnerable. "Just – I – so – so lately I was thinking!" She exclaimed, and gained back her usual ardor which eased Mae's worries about Mariella's potential troubles a little. "We used to do so much fun stuff together! Go to the movies, or shopping – remember when you bought me my first bra? Or when we went to San Myshuno, just us two together! We got prickly pear ice cream, and you bought me actual music cassettes, and then we went to an arcade to play video games! You remember?"

Mae did. Just her and Mariella, they'd let loose in the big city and do all the scandalous things their suburban neighborhood, with Herbert in the middle, would've frowned upon.

Eat ice cream before lunch, try out inappropriate clothing with knee holes or too short hem lines, listen to saucy pop songs in the music store and actually buy the tapes, and most of all, play video games – something Herbert would've never allowed his daughter, even if there were an arcade in Oasis Springs.

It was also the day Mae'd met Nia for the first time.

"Heh, you could just move in with me," her future roommate had winked at her, while Mae'd skimmed the arcade's bulletin board to find it consisted mostly of rental ads.

"I'll have a free room in a minute, I'm just about to kick out the trash of my cheatin' ex. Got a big kitchen 'n' living room, and even a balcony. And the rent's fair when split in half, too!"

She'd made it sound pretty tempting, if Mae'd looked for a place in San Myshuno, she'd moved in instantly. Or maybe it wasn't so much the description of the apartment, but the woman who offered it. Mae was instantly drawn to her cheeky smirk. So instead of clearing up the misunderstanding, she asked if there was an elevator, and before long they talked about anything and everything. 

Nia and her clicked immediately. Talking to her felt like talking to a long-lost old friend.

It was the first time Mae questioned if the struggle for her marriage was even worth it. If love wasn't the one-and-all happy ending she'd always dreamed about, she'd locked herself in that small town with its narrow boundaries for nothing; while missing out on all the life that was outside of it. For the first time, she let herself fantasize how it'd be to just break out of her suburbs and start over again; here in San Myshuno, with all its exciting opportunities.

"Of course I remember," Mae said. Thinking back, it tasted bittersweet.

"It was such a great day, wasn't it?" Mariella exclaimed. "We should totally do that again!"

"Uh- yes, yes, of course!" Mae confirmed. Mariella's out-of-the-blue change of attitude towards her caught her by surprise, but at the same time she was glad that Mariella apparently wanted to reconnect.

Still, she was curious what was the real reason, as it was clear now it wasn't a calamity.

"Anything specific you want to do?" Mae asked casually.

"Uh, not really..." Mariella mused remarkably unexcitedly, "shopping at the mall again... maybe ice cream again, go to a concert –" she took a sharp breath and held the air.

A-ha! A smile snuck on Mae's face. 

A concert it was!

Mariella would need a guardian as she was too young to be let inside alone. And of course Herbert would never accompany her there; in fact Mae was pretty sure he wouldn't allow his little baby-girl to see any concert at all. He treated his adolescent daughter as if she were still in primary school; or even younger.

Someone else might've feel offended by Mariella's motives to reconcile, but not Mae. 

No doubts Mariella would've tried her best to get into the concert one way or another. She might've strolled through the big city all by herself in the middle of the night and try and sneak into the venue, but instead she chose to call Mae instead. It showed that Mariella still counted on her enough to ask this favor, and that warmed her heart.

"What a great idea!" Mae said. "When do you want to come?"

"This Saturday?" Mariella asked meekly.

"Sure! Just tell me at what time to pick you up." Mae had a shift at the bar, but she'd trade it with a co-worker. Saturday nights were the busiest and had the most generous tips, but Mariella was more important than some – admittedly, otherwise very welcome – extra tips.

"Uhm- us..." It came a little cautious. "Fernandez is coming too."

"Fernandez?"

"He's getting the tickets," Mariella explained short-breathily.

"Oh... I see." Mae was a little disappointed to not have Mariella all to herself.

But she didn't dwell long on it. 

Honestly? She was excited that Mariella had a cute boy buying her tickets for a concert! She'd always guessed that Fernandez had it bad for Mariella, and Mae was so here for it! Contrary to his useless playboy dad, Fernandez was rather shy, and very sweet, and a loyal friend to Mariella since the day they first met in kindergarten.

Mariella could do a lot worse than her childhood best friend! Certainly Mae did in her time. When she just thought about her own first love disaster in high school...

"Yes – you said we could go to a concert, right?!" Mariella insisted. "Don't take it back!"

"I'm not taking it back," Mae chuckled. "Who we're gonna see?"

Mae tried to remember if she'd seen any billboards advertising any of Mariella's favorite pop stars' giving a concert in town.

"Toxic Purple!" Mariella shot out.

The name told Mae nothing at all.

"Fernandez gave me a CD once – they are so so so soo good! And Lyta's voice is sooo beautiful! And they're so authentic! Nothing like those poser boybands, like... like the Backstreet Boys or N'SYNC!" Mariella rambled, full of excitement.

"Of course! They must be really good then!" Mae faked some sympathy, but as she'd been all over boybands herself, her heart broke a little. Even more so, because she'd missed so much of Mariella's life in the barely two months they hadn't talked.

Mariella'd outgrown boybands already and moved on to more "serious" musicians... 

"And they really know what it's like to be misunderstood, and all on your own –" Mariella continued.

Mae's heart broke a little more. Not so long ago she'd been a misunderstood teenage girl herself, and her bad conscience over leaving Mariella intensified. 

"You understand, don't you?" Mariella pleaded. "I have to see them! I cannot miss them! But they won't let us in without a guardian, and it'll end late, and – and..."

"We'll go," Mae reconfirmed. "And afterwards you'll both stay here for the night."

Mariella cheered.

Then another thought crossed Mae's mind.

"What does your dad say about you visiting me?"

"Uh- uhm, he thinks it's a great idea!"

Something in Mariella's voice told Mae she wasn't quite honest.

"If I call him and tell him how excited I am that we're going to a concert together, he will not be surprised?" Mae teased. 

She was pretty sure that Herbert would be indeed very surprised hearing about Mariella's spontaneous plans to visit his ex-wife. 

"Mae, please!" Mariella squeaked, "you can't tell him about the concert! You know he'd never allow it; he'll... he'll ground me! Please don't tell him!!" She snivelled.

"Shh, of course I won't tell him about the concert," Mae assured the hysterical girl. "But you must tell him that you're visiting me."

As much as Mae'd love to see Mariella again, Mariella's father had to allow it. Mae wouldn't take the responsibility of having Herbert's underaged daughter coming over without his knowledge. She'd prefer he'd agree to it now instead of finding out later and then possibly cut off their relationship for good.

"But," Mariella still sobbed, "what am I gonna tell him if he asks why? He can't know where we'll go, and he'd find it weird if I want to visit you now, after... after..."

"Yeah... hm, let's see..." Mae quickly contemplated for a convincing reason.

"You need to go shopping, right? You didn't find anything in Oasis Springs, so you'll have to search for it here in the malls and of course you also need my help."

"Eh.. what is it, that I need?" Mariella asked, a little confused.

"Women's things, of course." Mae said gravely. 

"Oh! Yes, yes, of course!" Mariella exclaimed, finally understanding.

No further explanation was needed.

Herbert was a caring and responsible father to his daughter, but there were two things he'd always gladly left to Mae with zero complaints. Mariella's mischievous escapades in school and the ensuing parent-teacher conversations, as well as anything just remotely related to growing up as a girl.

Mae bet he wouldn't suddenly ask for more in-depth explanations, nor oppose his ex-wife taking care of Mariella's female needs again, if it meant taking such a very uncomfortable task off his head.

"Then it's settled," Mae said. "Don't forget to make a copy of his ID for the parental consent, and I'll take care of the rest."

It wouldn't be the first time she faked Herbert's signature.

Mariella'd often brought home letters from school with complaints about her impudent behavior and weak grades, which Mae'd usually signed in Herbert's place. She'd never gone through the lengthy and tedious process to officially adopt Mariella, so she couldn't sign them herself, but both her and Mariella preferred to not bother Herbert with these kinds of trivialities. Mariella, because she didn't want to be grounded again; her father's all-time remedy to her frequent escapades, and Mae, because she found motivating the girl doing her homework with weekend visits to the ice-cream parlor or the movies much more effective. Which obviously wasn't an option when Mariella was grounded. 

"Got it!" Mariella rasped conspiratorially.

Girls needed their little secrets from time to time. And Herbert hadn't much of a mind for some of the fun things Mae and Mariella did together; the rom-coms were too raunchy, the music too indecent, and dessert to be eaten after dinner, never before.

Concerts, for granted, would be just another thing on the list.

Narrow-minded, stuck up Herbert!

Mae's heart overpoured of tender feelings for her ex-husband.

Once again, like so many times before, she wondered why she couldn't just have taken the leap and go back? She missed him and Mariella so much! 

Something always had held her back from doing so, there always was that tiny voice that kept saying: if you'd still loved Herbert, you'd never want Francesco back! Funny enough, she hadn't wasted much of a thought about Francesco since she'd left Oasis Springs; far, far less than she'd brooded about Herbert and their broken relationship!
But instead of taking action and try and revert her terrible mistake, she continued like on autopilot, their divorce talks less emotional than small talk; and time passed by and she had done nothing to stop the process.

 
Now it was too late.

"How... how is he doing?" She asked hesitantly.

"Who? Dad? He's doing good. Much better than before."

Mariella's voice was suddenly flat and cold.

"He's dating again, you know? She's a teacher, too. A sports teacher."

"Oh."

"They have so much in common, both teaching kids, and sports, and stuff."

"I... I see. I'm happy for him."

"He's definitely happy, too."

There was a moment of uncomfortable silence while Mae tried to process the unexpected news.

"Mae?" Mariella squeaked. "We... we will go to the concert, right? You're not so mad at dad that you wouldn't take me anymore, right? I- I mean... it's not the only reason I wanna come, I really want us to be friends again! We can, right? Even if you and dad are not – right??"

Obviously, the concert was the only reason why Mariella'd called. Not that it mattered much to Mae now.

"Of course, I'd like to be friends again too," she said autonomously. "Did you pick a train yet? When will you be at the station?"

Mariella sighed with relief.

"Uhm- yes! Around four fifty-" 

Like in trance, Mae settled their meeting next Saturday, then they said good bye.

She went to put back the phone receiver.

So... Herbert found a new love again.

How sweet!

Mae was so excited for him!

She couldn't wish him anything but the best. Wasn't it great that he found a better match than her? Someone much more like him? Most likely the other woman also wanted babies like he did, wouldn't that be just perfect?

"Mae? Who was it?" Nia's voice came from far away and pulled Mae back into her living room.

"Uhm... Mariella called." Mae still had to gather herself.

"Did something happen in the Springs?" Diana asked. "You look as if you've seen a ghost!"

"What? No, nothing happened," Mae said truthfully.

Everything was fine.

Actually, good things had happened, for a change!

"Come." Nia led her to the couch and sat her down. 

"And now spit it out. What did she want?"

"Mariella wants to see a rock band with me!" Mae pronounced cheerfully. "She wants to meet up again. I'm so glad she's not so mad at me anymore!"

"Oh god! Not the same exact band in which your ex sings, isn't it?" Nia gasped.

For a second Mae pictured a leather-cladded Herbert growling into a microphone – such an absurdly wrong image! – Before it hit her that Nia was talking about Francesco.

In a rather fortunate coincidence for Mae, Mariella hadn't ever cared much for her best friend's dad's band; which coincidentally was also Francesco's. The girl was of the age, where, by default, parents and everything they did, were uncool by default.

Mae snickered.

"Oh, no, not that band! Actually, I've never heard of Mariella's favorite band before."

"Then what bothers you? Did she say something else?" Diana asked.

Only now Mae noticed that they'd caught everyone else's attention too. The rest of the room had all eyes on her, faces full of curiosity and sincere concern. Even little Lana and Oliver Twist, the fat cat, interrupted their silly chasing game and stayed still to stare at Mae.

That French detective's interrogation in Paris had been more comfortable than this!

"There's nothing bothering me," Mae chortled, "she'd just told me a little about home! She's probably having a boyfriend soon, Herbert is dating again t-too –"

She forcefully coughed out the thick lump that formed in her throat before it reached her eyes and she'd tear up.

Oh crap.

She had to be happy for Herbert! 

Not freakin' cry over his new found happiness!

On about half of her friends' faces arose deep sympathy.

"You poor thing!" Olivia sighed and almost poured her Martini out.

"So soon..." Diana breathed in disbelief.

Nia squeezed her shoulder.

The other half of her friends just looked very confused.

"But- what's the problem with it?" Ben asked.

"Yeah, wasn't it you who divorced him? Why would you care?"

Weston was one of the confused ones, too.

"Are you guys daft?!" Nia's voice was sharp like a knife, and her eyes shot daggers against them. "Have y'all completely scrapped your brains with all the pot yet?!"

"Yeah, how can you not understand?!" Diana exclaimed too.

"Understand what? I'd rather expect -"

It ensued a rather loud argument when each and everyone had to butt their two cents in.

Mae though, would rather be anywhere else than to try and explain her feelings.

She gathered her last bit of energy and went into her room.

It bugged her so much, didn't it.

All the time, she'd felt as if Herbert didn't really love her anymore, and this was the proof, wasn't it?

He'd replaced her so easily.

Wherever she went; it didn't matter how nice the men seemed at first, eventually they all turned out to be selfish and cold-hearted in one way or another.

Why couldn't she just fall in love with a woman instead?

She'd have to stay alone all her life, or she'd end up in just another tiresome, sad and draining relationship again, where she'd give all of herself, and get nothing in return.

No, Mae didn't want that.

She was done with men, love and relationships.